Random thoughts…

Disappointments in the great white north!

I used to be the greatest advocate and supporter of McDonald’s nuggets. I have eaten them for longer than I can remember and were one of the greatest treats, in Australia. Not anymore. I used to scoff when people made claims about nuggets containing anything but chicken meat, because the nuggets in Australia contain chicken meat, and tasted awesome. However I am greatly let down by nuggets in Canada. They are disgusting. They taste like lard covered in a batter of lard and deep fried to disgusting golden. I am not sure what is in them, because whatever it is does not actually taste like anything fit for human or animal consumption. Even dipping them in sauce does not help, in fact it just reminds you that you are trying to cover up something that just should be thrown in the garbage. I don’t think even burning it would do anything.

Which brings me to my second point, do they put crack inTim Hortons? Because I have tried it, I like coffee and thought if I’m going to be living here for a while I should try the local cuisine. If you have never tried it, don’t! And if you do drink TH’s, what is wrong with your taste buds??? It is not worth your time or effort. The only people that visit TH are very dodgy looking and the coffee tastes like dirty dish water. Oh, and I ordered a cappuccino, not just drip coffee, so I don’t understand why it was so bad. But Canadians love the crap, so clearly Rob Ford has had something to do with the production of the coffee beans and added crack.

And then there is peameal bacon. So you take the crap part of the bacon and cover it in something and then warm it slightly and serve it. If I wanted uncooked pigs fat I would have stayed in Australia, where they have no idea what crispy bacon is. At least the Americans know how to cure and cook bacon, and use the correct part of the bacon strip. I don’t care what you do with the other part, just do not serve it to me and expect me to eat it.


I stabbed myself in the thumb with a staple remover…

So, as the title states, I did in fact stab myself in the right thumb (I am right handed), just below my nail, with a staple remover, and it drew blood! I was quite impressed and shocked that a staple remover, which doesn’t appear to be that sharp, could not only puncture my skin, but also go deep enough to draw blood. Although then came the highlight of my wound – I can’t use my phone… I have an iPhone and I am right handed, so I do almost everything on my phone with my RIGHT THUMB!!! And yet, that is still not the most interesting thing. The most interesting thing is that I am wearing stockings today, and trying to pull up stockings without using one thumb is difficult!

I have now become a little proud and fearful of my staple remover. It is black, and just a basic staple remover, I think I shall name him stabbie. I know this is not a real word, but a staple remover is also an inanimate object and yet I am naming him. Deal with it!

How was your weekend – Follow up!

Following on from “How was your weekend?”, the next most annoying thing, is when you sit down to eat your lunch and read your book and people want to try to talk to you. I am reading my book, which means the same as wearing headphones, I do not want to be disturbed and it would be ever so great if you left me alone. Do you care what I am reading? No, then why ask. I don’t want to be a part of your conversation, I am simply trying to eat my lunch and read my book in peace. I do not want to talk to you. Do I care what you are eating? No. Hence why I don’t ask you, so please don’t pry into my mouth and ask what I am eating.¬†

So for future reference, if you see me sitting alone eating my lunch with my nose in a book, do not ask me questions. Do not flirt with the intern and make a joke at my expense. I like to lose myself in my books and have food issues, so please don’t make that part of my day harder than it has to be. Just leave me alone.

By the way, I’m re-reading Harry Potter – I went on the weekend and bought the whole series, damn subliminal messaging on The Big Bang Theory!

How was your weekend?

Why, when you work in an office, do people insist on asking how your weekend was, or what you did? Do you care? No. Then why ask. I don’t care what you did and make a point of not asking. I don’t have you on Facebook to share my life with, so why do you make a point of asking me this question on a Monday morning, as if I don’t have better things to think about. Like what I’m having for lunch. And it is made that much worse when the person asking has children, because they MUST tell you that they spent time with their child/children, like I care. Congratulations, you are a parent and are performing your parental duties, would you like an award? Do I tell you that when I went book shopping I left the TV on for my 2 dogs? No, and why do you ask, because you don’t really want to know. Do I tell you that on Friday’s I go to my tattoo artist and sit for 4-5 hours while she jabs my arm with needles full of colour? This one if because I don’t want you to know about it. I don’t feel the need to tell everyone about everything I do. If I wanted you to know about my personal life (key word being personal), then I would share some of these details about myself with you. But instead I simply say, “Good, how was yours.” And please don’t mistake this for caring, I simply say this so there will no follow up questions, that and these people like to talk about themselves, as if anyone cares.

I can see the look in your eyes when I tell you I bought a skateboard and went skateboarding and stacked it. You don’t care. You’re looking at me like I’m an alien because I do something other than work or procreate. This information does not start a conversation with these people, if anything it makes sure to end it right there and then. And then they wonder why I don’t share my life with them. If you don’t like the answer, why ask the question. I am not a boring person. I do things. But this “normal” ritual of sharing your weekend activities with colleagues baffles me. Unless you work closely with someone or they are your friends, then by all means share your stories, chances are you did something together and have things to add, but other than that it is unnecessary and a waste of time. So please, stop doing it.